Oh the places you'll go

I haven't written in a long long while. It's nice to be back.

This weekend at our monthly Snack and Yak, we are going to be talking about discernment and our futures. Normally, talking about the future is a taboo subject. The often feared "what are you going to do with your life" question is right up there with religion and politics when it comes to conversation starters.

So I guess it makes sense that we're going to talk about it in LVC. We like taboo subjects.

While I'm sure every generation--and every individual--has its own unique set of obstacles, I think people my age and my level of privilege have a lot of conflicting goals and expectations to balance. We have the luxury to take time to discover for ourselves what our true passions are, to travel and see the world, and still have our parents pay our phone bills. We want to be adults and do great things, but we still have a lot of growing up to do. It doesn't help that well paying jobs are hard to find, and things like the Peace Corps (and LVC...) is the sexy cool alternative to buckling down and grinding through the work day at an entry level position.

A lot of times, it feels like this:  http://whatshouldwecallme.tumblr.com/post/23043795178/after-graduation-when-anybody-asked-if-i-had-gotten-a

And I don't mean to sound overly critical of these kinds of experiences. Because let's be real--I'm a walking example of it. And I wouldn't trade my experiences abroad or my minimally-paid jobs and volunteer positions for anything. They have been life changing and incredibly fulfilling. These kinds of jobs have allowed me to better understand my goals for the future.

But it's a tricky balance. It's hard not to look back sometimes and think, "Did I just waste 6 months that I could have been working towards something bigger?" "When will I actually get a 'real' job?" "This kind of life isn't sustainable. I can't keep being a summer intern forever!"

After this exceptionally great experience working at a non profit child advocacy organization in Nebraska, I am moving back home for a year before starting law school. And this makes me nervous. Not that I'm afraid my parents will treat me like a child and I'll have a 9:30 curfew, but I'm worried I'll be "wasting" another year. Repeating the cycle of starting over; trying to find a job that is meaningful work, yet knowing I'll be gone in a year.

In the push and pull and inevitability of growing up, where does volunteerism or back packing across Asia fit into real life? Is it simply an escape from responsibility in the name of exploration and personal growth? Or can they be the avenues to finding fulfillment?

I had an amazing professor who talked about 2 year plans. Have an idea for what you are doing for two years, and let the rest of the future fall into place. Don't plan your life for the next 10, 15, or 20 years. It will either blind you to the new and wonderful opportunities you could never have planned for, or set you up for incredible disappointment.

Yet I'm still excited. I'm still incredibly young with lots of opportunities to take and mistakes to be made. To practice being an adult, with a solid safety net to catch me if I fall. Even though I'm not planning on falling anytime soon.